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Well, today the book was printed out – again – for editing – again – with the hope that I won’t have to do it … again.

I know, I know: I’m the same as everyone else when it comes to writing, editing and ultimately publishing a book. It takes longer than I want. I want it to be the best I can possibly make it. I want to present a story that holds together from beginning to end. I want to entertain the reader, whoever he or she may be.

And then I edit, and edit, and edit. I get bored of bits of it (and if I’m bored, what is the reader thinking?) I get frustrated with sentences and paragraphs that I have rewritten repeatedly and still don’t sound right. I cry at the parts where it all goes wrong.

It turns out I am best at one of the crucial parts of editing: walking away. Give me a chance to pop off for a cup of tea, or meet up with friends, or go shopping… and I’ll gladly escape, telling myself that it is important to give my writing space. I must allow time for the edits to sink in, for comments to be realised, for the perfect words to come.

Yeah right.

Today, when I sat down and worked at the book I realised it wasn’t going to take as long as I thought to finish off the bits that I knew were wrong (note: I found many new parts that were wrong as well!) Every time I tweaked a sentence, or rearranged a chapter, or rephrased a paragraph I knew I was improving the book, and I knew I was that much closer to the final product.

Does having done it once before help? Yes, as I know the timescales I can expect before it will be able to be physically held in my hands, but in other ways no, as it still needs to be written!

I am determined not to walk away from it, and I am determined to make it as good as I can. I anticipate the next week will be filled with moments of despair as I re-read the book once more and wonder why anyone would be interested by it… interspersed with moments of joy, laughter and tears as I re-live the writing. Editing benefits from breaks, but it also benefits from hard work, and that is what the coming week (or two) holds.

Regular readers of this blog will realise that I like to promote good things about Zambia: indeed, good things about Africa in general, as we so often get overwhelmed by miserable, depressing news from the continent.

Don’t misunderstand me: I am not trying to say that there is not poverty, or injustice, or starvation, or malnutrition, or HIV/AIDS, or corruption, or a lack of decent education, or refugee crises, or exploitation, or drought, or war, or…

What I am saying is that GOOD THINGS DO HAPPEN.

Hooray!

And one of them is The Extraordinary Project. People who follow me on Facebook will know I have begun sharing this project’s posts: 40 days of the people and photos in their magnificent book.

But I run away with myself. You are no doubt asking, “What is The Extraordinary Project?”

It is a collaboration between Gareth Bentley (Zambian, photographer) and Johan Rahm (Swedish, writer) to celebrate the different, exciting, diverse people of Zambia. Together they have produced a book (available locally in Lusaka: I’ll let you know when it is available worldwide) that introduces us, as readers, to the many wonderful people of the country.

In their words:

Zambia is an unknown entity to so many around the world. Like her neighbors, the country is rich in wildlife, minerals and natural beauty but unlike much of the continent Zambia has remained peaceful during the transition to self-rule and subsequently through five changes of government. In spite of this, or more likely because of this, Zambia and Zambians are rarely seen on screens or in print around the world where war, hunger and disaster most often describe the continent.

Living in Zambia, we kept meeting people with amazing personal stories and the idea for this project was born. In this book we try to unearth and celebrate the lives of the different, the passionate, the inspiring. From a boy drafted out of his village school to fight in the jungles of Burma in World War II to the young filmmaker who made it to Cannes with her first movie, to the elderly man who in his youth fought for and gained independence for his country; each story a thread in the tapestry that makes Zambia the unique place that it is.

As collaborators on this project, we represent two very different perspectives on Zambia. Gareth is a Zambian citizen, his family having settled here in the late 1800s and Johan is a Swede who has lived in Zambia for 5 years. These two perspectives have been extremely important in trying to achieve some form of balance.

Inside the country many of the people who share their stories in this book are completely unknown to most Zambians. We hope this book will be a source of pride to the next generation of Zambians in all walks of life.

From an outside perspective, the portrayal of Africa is seriously skewed. Most of the news that reaches audiences on other continents has to do with war and famine. Nothing could be further from the truth when it comes to Zambia. It is time that Africa and Zambia are portrayed in a fashion that reflects the truth. We hope that this book in some small way will contribute to that cause.

The most difficult problem we have had while working on this book is to limit the number of people we include. We have come across so many fascinating stories. The selection we have made should not be seen as a definitive list of the most extraordinary people in Zambia. How could it ever be possible to make such a list? Rather we would like it to be seen as examples of how many great people there are in Zambia and what amazing things they have achieved. We hope to carry on working on this project and continue to find and publish more extraordinary Zambian stories.

Do go to the website and view some of the marvellous pictures … and then lobby them to get the book available worldwide! The photos are amazing, and the stories bring joy to the heart. Take Day 3, for example, and the story of Chembe Mwanza, Acrobat and Outreach worker. Had you associated Zambia with Acrobats? I presume not! The story of his life from being thrown out onto the streets by his stepmother, through living rough in the capital city to his discovery of a love of theatre and acrobatics is inspiring for all.

I wholeheartedly commend the book and the project to you.

www.extraordinaryzambia.org

Follow me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CatharineWithenayWriter

This week I started something that I never thought I’d do: completely re-writing a chapter that I loved as it was.

It is a crucial chapter of the book, so I won’t spoil things too much by sharing it, but I’d drafted it almost like a poem: short lines and sentences, all present tense and laid out differently from the novel standard. The feedback I’d had was that it jarred with the rest of my writing. In my head, that was the point: it was supposed to stand out as different, as a complete emotional change.

So I have resisted.

And, this week, I gave in.

I took a deep breath, copied the existing text into a new document, and set about annihilating it. I put the speech into quotation marks. I changed it into the past tense. I made paragraphs, and smoothed the story out.

I have not enjoyed this process. Every piece of writing advice tells you that you must be dispassionate about the work you have created; that you must step back and view it as the first-time reader would. And – if necessary – you must cut and chop and change.

But it is the most painful thing to do. It is agonising to remove words and phrases that you love, that you carefully carved out of the English language. I have not enjoyed this process. It isn’t finished, and when I reach the end I will have to go back and re-edit it, as some of the ordering of events now sounds wrong.

Is it better? Perhaps. Probably.

You see: I am still struggling to let my arty first draft go, to set that creative genius (I flatter myself!) free and allow the book to flow with one style of writing throughout. I suspect that it will be better, but the anguish of the process is so unpleasant.

Killing my baby? Yes, but she’s currently drowning, struggling for air and I’m not sure whether to hold her under or lift her out. Time will tell.

Not the best poetry in the world, but I enjoyed thinking about it as I wrote it…

Rich and creamy
smooth and silky
liquid
chunky
solid
soft

poured as a treat
a dip to cover
strawberry
pineapple
biscuit
brioche

raw indulgence
baked delight
cake
mousse
cookie
tart

thank you present
apology offered
please
sorry
will you?
yes!

melted, dripping
licked from fingers
lips
toes
who knows?

dark as the night
white as a cloud
milky
spicy
speckled
swirled

tempt and tantalise
feast or famine
off diet
on diet
but always
MINE!

Writing a second book is proving a lot more difficult than writing the first. The first took seven years. This one I’ve set some deadlines, and seven months is closer to the target. Right now it feels like seven decades still wouldn’t be enough.

Ok, I know that’s not true, but you’ve hit me on a bad day when I should have written tons and I’ve actually dabbled at bits of nothing.

Here’s the state of progress. I have a lot of words – indeed, the majority of the book – that I wrote some time ago which need pulling together into an actual story. As I gradually do that, I realise just how much of what I wrote isn’t any good anyway. So, together with the cutting and pasting there is a lot of re-write. Or simply delete. I’m at the stage where this is quite demoralising. I can’t quite see where it is I’m going with the whole manuscript and every page just throws up more errors and dissatisfaction.

I’ve devised a plan of attack, though. Firstly, I’m not even looking at the beginning of the book yet. I know that will be very difficult: for In the Shade of the Mulberry Tree I rewrote and re-ordered the first three chapters more times than I can count. The additional problem in a sequel is that I have to introduce the characters and places afresh to new readers, but not in a way that bores established readers with repetition. Not an easy task, and not one I’m facing just yet.

Secondly, I’m taking individual chapters or stories and updating them in separate documents. In theory, I can then slot them all together again and have a wonderful flowing narrative. (Ok, so the ‘flow’ might encounter a few boulders, holes and unexpected whirlpools along the way but there will be more structure than at present.) Looking at the smaller pictures means that I can also write the parts that are appealing and appropriate for my mood for the day. Yesterday it was weddings; today it is car travails.

(In fact, I sometimes think the book could simply be about car problems…)

Thirdly, I am really trying to block out time for writing and editing. I’m not answering the front door, nor the phone. I’m abandoning the children to CBBC or the Wii. I’m making easy dinners. At times it feels like a dereliction of duty, but it enables me to make progress, and if I’m to get anywhere close to my goal I need to block time to focus on it alone.

It has a backhanded benefit: when I do have time with the family, it is truly time with them. I’m not spending it alongside them doing other things, but we genuinely play games together, or read together, or watch interesting TV together (you know, TV that we can discuss together afterwards, rather than wish we hadn’t wasted that hour of our life…)

So Book 2 will happen… is happening… but it is going to be a long haul and will require every bit of my creative energy.

On which note, I’d better get back to being… well, creative!

I have only one aim for 2014: to finish writing and publish “Book 2”.

Ok, as always, I have a New Year Resolution to lose weight, but I anticipate that will go by-the-by. Eat less; exercise more: I know what to do, but somehow it never quite happens that way.

Put the ‘do-good’ resolutions aside: my one aim for 2014 is to complete Book 2.

I will have to support the family, of course. One Grandpa is going to have a heart operation (stents); the other is recently widowed (but still travelling the globe). The children still need ferrying around to music lessons, swimming, drama, school events, etc. My daughter will leave primary school and I’ll have endless meetings with teachers and SENCOs to ensure the transition is happy.

But that’s ok. Family stuff happens. I’ll just write around it. After all, my one aim is to write Book 2.

We also have plans for a holiday or two. Most excitingly, a family trip to Zambia (although the bank balance is making uncomfortable noises at the thought!) but also some camping around the UK. But that’s ok: I’m entitled to a break from writing, aren’t I? Zambia could even be considered research…

No, my sole aim is the completion of Book 2.

Although there is also my cello playing, and church commitment.

And the cricket to watch.

And Wimbledon always distracts me for a couple of weeks.

And there’s the Great British Bake Off, and Strictly, and Have I Got News For You, and other earth-shatteringly important things to watch on TV.

And occasionally my husband works less than a 14 hour day so I’ll want to spend time with him then.

And we’ve promised ourselves that we will go out and catch some culture this year – some plays, or concerts, or shows, or anything.

So: plenty of time for writing and publishing Book 2.

No chance of distraction or procrastination at all.

Roll on 2014*…

(*What? Near the end of January already? But I haven’t started yet…)

I saw this post on Fishinkblog’s Blog and couldn’t help but love the nostalgia of looking at vintage book covers. Take a look yourself, and enjoy!

Idly wasting time whilst we wait in the car for the end of my son’s concert band practice, my daughter decides to root through my handbag. Her first aim is to play on my phone. When I refuse this (any number of telephony disasters could have occurred) she just proceeds to empty out more of my belongings.

Note to self: should – personally – filter through handbag more often

She finds my glasses and, as you would expect of any curious child, she tries them on. I remember doing the same with my own parents’ specs, and as I watched my daughter all I could hear was my mother telling me I would damage my eyes if I wore her glasses.

Would I? Really? Is that a myth, or a fact? I can appreciate that wearing them for any length of time and my eyes would adapt to them… thus ruining otherwise perfect vision. But how long is too long?

Anyway, I restrained myself from getting edgy with my daughter and just looked at her. Everyone says that she looks like me, so I suspected this was my best chance to see what I look like to others.

“I look like E,” she said (referring to her best friend who wears glasses). “Or the blind woman.”

Blind woman?

The only blind woman we both know has recently got a guide dog, and her glasses don’t look anything like mine. They are considerably larger, tortoiseshell and the lenses are a lot thicker. After all, she’s blind. I’m merely ageing.

“You know, mum. The blind woman. From The Voice.”

Ah! It all makes sense, though quite where she dragged that memory from I’ll never know. So maybe I look a little like Andrea Begley. If only I could sing like her as well…